A Little Story

On a recent grocery acquisition mission, I found myself in an unusual predicament: I was at a loss for words.

I was minding my own doggone business. Waiting to pay my bill and vamoose. Captive to the blip-blip-blip across the conveyer belt. And then the checker had the nerve to give me a simpering grin and ask, "Awww, do you have a little one at home?"

I do not.

I looked up sharply, instantly wondering what had triggered such a query. Maybe I looked plump in a post-partumly way?! My eyes narrowed as I scanned my ensemble for wayward spills. Did I look haggard and sleep-deprived as only a wrangler of young 'uns can? When I realized the man was referring to the contents of my cart, I did a rapid inventory and catalogued some red flags amidst all the fresh produce:

Milk. Multiple gallons of it. {I married a dairy farmer's son, and you can't take the farm out of the boy.}

Okay...could be considered a "little one" beverage.

But it's not. It's for Husby and me. We douse our cereal. We sip at mealtimes. And we like it as an accompaniment to my baking experiments.

High quality entertainment. I'm a hard-working girl, and I value the opportunity to relax and surround myself with the artistic nuances of claymation filmmaking.

Might be something you'd take home to a "little one" with a well-defined sense of cinematic greatness.

But in this case, I simply adore Wallace and Gromit. Clever stuff, that. Sophisticated, multifaceted, charming humor.

Vitamins. I'm far more likely to take in the recommended nutritional supplements if they're cloaked in something that tastes good. Like gummy fish.

Any mom worth her salt would be willing to pass off these healthy-for-you vitamin supplements as an afternoon treat for a "little one".

But they are for me. Yes, as a matter of fact I do need a little coercing to take my vitamins.

So, back to the check-out line and the nosy guy...

I hemmed.

I hawed.

And then I just said the only thing I could say to that very personal question. Little one at home, eh?

"Yep, I sure do."